Observations I have made:
My teacher smells like cigarettes and coffee.
Winter is for lovers.
I feel like writing a poem.
Or maybe painting.
I came home this weekend for a visit. Leah's birthday was Tuesday so I thought we could celebrate a little later. Tomorrow we are having a "Dude Day" which may sound like a couple of guys hanging out but it actually translates to a "Leah-Sarah Day." Somehow we acquired this nickname and it has stuck ever since!
Packing a bag to take to my house was a new experience. I did it the first time I came home but this time I really thought about what I was doing. Do I really need to take shampoo and conditioner to my house? My toothbrush? No. It should be right next to the sink where it always is, right next to the toothpaste that never has the cap on.
Once I got here I realized College Park was still the same. The people are still the same. But I'm not. I've been trying to "soak it all up," to really experience home. How can that be done? I feel like there is some strange thing I should be doing that I somehow can't figure out. Like, somehow I am missing a necessary task that makes my trip home complete. Is it possible to feel at home when you only visit for 3 days? I'm not sure. I'll let you know. So far, I'm leaning towards a no.
I think this is just how God works. He closes doors and opens others. Right now He closed my door to College Park. Not entirely, I'm still connected with the people, I love them so much! But He has called me to Tallahassee and I think it's best to follow His voice. I was really struggling with that this past week. I did a lot of thinking. That's where the trouble started. I thought about how nice it would be to be in College Park. I thought about Park Avenue in Christmas time and all of the kindergarten and first graders at the Community Center. I thought about jogging around the neighborhood and snuggling with Shelbs every night.
Luckily, God stepped in and directed me to FUEL last night where He reminded me of His role in my life. He directs me. I don't have to do the thinking. He's got that under control.
I guess my life right now is an endless process.
A process of seeking God and getting comfortable with being uncomfortable.
And thanking Him for the smiles along the way.